Corn.---> Corn Stalks----> Stalking --->stockings--->presents----->Future.

Me.
heh
hah
hahaha
how you doin'?
I love you man.
Can I come stalk you later?
Too bad.
Cuz I'll be in the sky.
I'll be there
right behind you.
Remember the jacket I hid in your tree?
You wear it all the time I see.
I hope it keeps you warm.
I know how much it reminds you of me. (Heck it reminds me of me too!)
Yoooouuuuu Weeeaaarrr itttt.
Yooouuuuu Liiiiiivvveee ittttt.
Yooooouuuu Knnnnoooowwww itttttt.
Love, Your ultra loving super hott ex.
(DRUGS)
-A collaborative stalker song written by Alyssa and Ali

Butter Fever

JUST BUTTER
SO today in math class, I was falling asleep
(as per usual)
And extremely bored
(As per usual)
And the girl sitting in front of me had
none other than
a Justin Beiber folder.
(UUUNNNGGHHHH)
It was yellow.
He was womanly.
And for some reason, in my mind I read
"JUST BUTTER."
I sat there, confused.
"What? Why would she have a folder about butter?"
"And why is Bieber on there?"
And then I realized that wasn't what happened at all! But then I realized that the premonition side of my brain could be acting up again.
Predicting the Beiber's death by butter.
Either A mob of angry citizens creates a bubbling pot of hot butter, they storm his house and drown him in it,
or,
Due to his sadness over breaking up with Demi Lovato, or Taylor Swift... or Taylor Lautner...
He goes on a butter binge.
And it kills him.
Haha! I can see him sitting in that pot.
someone walks up to him and is like
"Bieber??? Whaaaatttttttt??"
And nonchalantly he replies
"What? Nothing! I'm just in butter!"
HAHA! Get it? Justin butter???
Heh. heh.. ha.
not funny.
Anyway... No, this ain't a death threat...
No, this is not a death threat.
it isn't.
not at all.

EEEEP

So... Haha. Have I got a story for you!
Yes, yes I do!
My little sister (13)came up to me just barely, as I was shutting the door to my room...
and she says
"There's a centipede in your room, I just thought you might want to know!"
Which to me is akin to...
"TROLL IN THE DUNGEON!... Just thought you ought to know..."
Except I'm the one that passes out at the end of that sentence...
And then I asked...
"Why the devil didn't you kill that monster!"
Her: "Hercules (one of our cats) was playing with it!"
Me: "Gaaaaaaah!"
So I am now huddled in my bed, not allowing my feet to touch the floor, lest a creeper bug crawls on them and chews on me!!!

Ali likes to...

I got tagged in this dealio on facebook, and I thought it was pretty funny...

Rule: Go to Google and type your name in quotations with likes to next to it, like "Ali likes to", and hit search. Write the first ten things that come up.

1. Ali likes to... enjoy life!
2. Ali likes to... point out similarities—the intertwined roots of Islam, Christianity, and Judaism.
3.Ali likes to... sculpt clay figurines!
4.Ali likes to... read mysteries (and try to solve them!)
5.Ali likes to... swallow the gravy!
6.Ali likes to... run and play like any other child!
7.Ali likes to... be kissed and flirted with!
8.Ali likes to...spend quality time with her best friend, promote and husband Johnny !
9.Ali likes to... read, go on hikes, and school people at tennis!
10.Ali likes to... eat at Grotta Azurra, a restaurant in New York, located in Little Italy!

Would I survive a zombie apocalypse?

At this point, I'm really not sure.
Although, at this point, with MY mental/physical stability, they would probably mistake me for one of them.
DANG I'm tired.
Anywhoo...
ZOMBIES.
I really feel like this is worrisome. I mean,
I'm not kick-awesome enough to fight millions of those things.
And then there is the problem of...
I refuse to eat brains!
(once I turn into one of them of course.)
I'll have to be... like a vegetarian zombie.
Eat... weeds or something.
That would so be me. Trailing behind the rest of the zombie horde, picking dandelions and stuffing them daintily (NOT) into my mouth.
Seriously, though, I can think of like, a whole story about this.

---It's a dark, stormy night. The rain beats gown on the roof so hard, it sounds like gunfire. Ali and her man (lets call him Alfonze) hide in a corner, machine guns searching for a target, as moans and howls drift through the abandoned warehouse. Pounding begins on the barricaded doors. The doors that happen to be the only way in or out of the room. Suddenly, all is quiet. The only thing to be heard is the rain, the wind wandering the hallways, and the breathing of the two doomed, trapped in their small prison. Then, with inhuman screams, decaying arms begin to burst through the wooden door. The wood begins to splinter, and Alfonze reaches for Ali's hand, hefting his gun in the other. As the zombies burst through the door, Ali and Alfonze begin shooting.
Blood Spatters.
But there are just too many! With an angry roar, a zombie knocks the gun out of Ali's hand and bites down on her arm. She screams in pain and kicks it away. Her eyes widen and dilate.She falls to the floor twitching. "NOOOOOOOO!" Alfonze yells, and drags her unresponsive self out into the now empty hall. The rest of the zombies stumble after them. Alfonze limps into another smaller room, and slams the door. Ali is no longer breathing. "NO" Alfonze sobs. Ali's body begins to twitch and her eyes wander behind closed eyes. Alfonze grabs her gun and points it at her forehead, but winces and throws it away. He then screams and grabs her gun and kicks through the door, shooting wildly.
Seconds later, Ali's eyes snap open, completely white.
"DANDELIONS!!!"----
The End.
Yes, that was all real.
Alfonze became a zombie hours later.
Would you have shot me???
(I'm an idiot)

Blinded by Science

SO today we were talking about gravity
And how weak it was (Yeeeah take that, gravity you're weak!)
And my teacher brought up the question...
So what keeps us from being pulled right through the center of the earth?
MIND. BLOWN.
How come I've never thought of this before?

Apparently, the electrons from your shoes/feet... whatever... and the whatever surface you happen to be standing on have a little disagreement. They don't want to be by each other! So they push apart.
(Which I figure was either a super dumbed down explanation or a complete lie...)
And then I lost concentration and started grinding my feet into the ground and thinking
"TAKE THAT, ELECTRONS!"
Before getting bored and drawing a batmobile.
And THEN I started thinking of the many things you could blame on electrons.

"NO man I didn't punch that kid in the face! The electrons got in the way!"
"No way did I kiss your boyfriend! Don't you know that electrons keep us from ever REALLY touching anything!?"
Haha. Iiiii'm an idiot.
But there ya go.
And Ps. / disclaimer...
I have never kissed anyone's boyfriend.